Store One Redux
by B. R. Shepherd
Remember that awesome printable job form I found for Store One earlier? After all the drama with the online applications?
I printed it out on our nicest, 28 lb. paper and started filling it out with a confident, black gel-ink pen. Happy as a lark, I was.
I get to Section 2, Box 3. “For store management or office based opportunities at our Regional or Geelong National Office, please refer to our website www.storeone.au.*” .au. The cognitive dissonance isn’t buzzing the alarms yet. Maybe Store One’s main office isn’t in the U.S. Moving on.
I wonder why the application didn’t ask for details about my college education. Ok, odd, but…moving…on….
Alright, Section 6, character references! Only it’s calling them “referees.” Well that’s interesting. “Referee’s organisation.” With an s. I suppose a British person wrote the form.
Section 7 asks me four very good questions (to which I give well-thought-out, honest answers):
- “What do you perceive as good customer service?”
- “What are some of your traits that makes you an ideal candidate for a customer service position?”
- “What does teamwork mean to you?”
- “Why do you believe safety is important in the workplace?”
Section 8 is about rights to work . . . for Australians.
Section 10. Oh, that section where you have that brief, queasy, cold-palms moment when you feel like you’re signing your soul away and if you made one minute mistake in filling everything out, they’ll drag you away to everlasting perdition.
I’ve spent an hour filling out an application to work at Store One in Australia.
I’d love to go to Australia. I really would. That’s where all the hotties are. Also, there’s koalas and those lovely landscapes. But the timing’s all wrong, beautiful Australia. It’s not you. It’s me.
*Not a working link. As you’ve discovered, I am sure.